One of the important things I do with my clients is behavior modification. That means I show them another way of doing something that achieves a desired result that they have been unable to obtain or in a way that does it better.
Unfortunately, most people default to being resistant to change, including the author. To overcome that resistance, the benefits of making the change must be observably and measurable by the person making the behavioral change.
Some of the changes seem small, but as we are all creatures of habit. [quotesright]It takes ongoing nudging and reinforcement for that change to become their new default behavior. [/quotesright]
Here is a real life example: I have a client that was having trouble with one of his clients. [quotes]Email after email was going back and forth with no resolution and continued frustration. [/quotes] He was ready to write another more detailed email when I asked him if he had tried picking up the phone and calling the person.
After some protests, the answer was “no.” Eventually he defiantly said, “I’ll call them and outline their options clearly, like I did in the emails.”
I coached that he consider calling the client, acknowledging there is an issue, but then to just ask what they want to do and then not say a word.
[quotes]“Why would I do that?” he asked.[/quotes] I told him that when people are cornered they will defend their position much more than they really need to and that by asking them what they want to do, you keep your options open (and your power) and they might surprise you with their response.
He gave it a go and the issue was resolved immediately without continued drama.
Reinforcing this change and having someone outside to make sure he is getting on the phone with people as his default, has now grown him personally. He’s now working toward become an accomplished public speaker and recognized expert in his field.
By a minor modification of his behavior and with continued coaching to make sure it sticks, my client is evolving at a rapid pace. And I’m excited for him! He is quickly becoming ready to grow his business at a high rate.
How can you put this insight to work in your company?
The key to “selling” behavior modification is that it must be seen as value added, just like any other purchase a consumer makes. You are selling:
- A better way,
- The promise of a path to success and growth,
- Less stress, and
- An improved quality of life.
The point is that behavior change requires that the employee believe that the right change will help them achieve their goals, even if they don’t exactly know what their goals are. In other words, they have to overcome their resistance to change and to commit to evolving beyond the ways they have done things in the past.
As coaches we are charged with having the skills, experience, and insights to help our clients see there is a better and more productive path forward, then help them follow the path. You can do the same thing with your team.
And what is better for your work and business is better for your life, because they are ultimately the same thing.
- by Mikke Pierson
